I talk a lot with clients about the benefits of creating structure in their lives through schedules and routines, both personally and professionally, in order to achieve their goals and live the type of life that supports less stress and greater success.
Honestly, it’s what I am good at. Give me an area of your life where you are struggling, share with me your vision for how you’d like it to be, and I will help you create the structure (i.e. schedules and routines) to achieve your desired outcome.
On a personal note, one thing that I have clearly been reminded during these past six weeks with a new baby is the distinct difference between a schedule and a routine. They are related, but they are not the same.
A schedule is focused on a specific period of time; either minutes, hours, days, weeks or months. Think about going to a meeting or conference. When you get the agenda, you receive a plan for the event that is tied to very specific times. You will talk or hear about this topic at this time of the day. The schedule gives you structure day so you can then know and plan your day based on when you need to be where at what time.
A routine is focused not on specific times, but rather on a series of tasks. These tasks may be tied to a schedule (i.e. specific times), but they don’t have to be. Routines are what we create around the everyday elements of our life. Think about your routine for getting ready for bed. Most likely you have a certain series of tasks that you complete each night before you go to bed, regardless of whether it’s at 9 p.m. or 11 p.m.
My bedtime routine consists of turning off lights, locking doors, using the bathroom to wash my face and brush my teeth, getting into my pajamas and then checking on the kids one last time before I get into bed. This is pretty much the same night after night. The routine is predictable and has become second nature; I don’t have to think about it much and the times that I complete the tasks vary somewhat night to night.
Because I like to create schedules and routines and it comes very naturally for me, I found myself almost immediately trying to create them around my life with a newborn.
Let me tell you, trying to apply a schedule at this stage is a recipe for frustration. Having a new baby turns every schedule you had upside down. In the face of that chaos, I tried to take some control by creating new ones.
Problem is that a newborn is not necessarily going to cooperate with your plans.
As much as I’d like to say that the baby naps at these times and eats at these times so that I have a better sense of structure in my life these days, it’s just not reasonable to expect this to happen.
Instead, I am now taking the cues from the six week old and keeping track of what natural routine is emerging for him. I have learned that his tendency is to sleep, eat and then be awake for a bit before starting the routine again. How long he does each of these and what times of the day he does them is all over the place.
The schedule will come and I have to remind myself to be patient and enjoy the unpredictability of life without one for the time being.
Coaches Corner:
Think about the difference between schedules and routines in your own life. When is a schedule appropriate (perhaps your morning routine needs to be on a certain schedule in order to get your kids to school and you to work by a certain time)? What times can you be more focused on the routine, but not attach the tasks to a specific time-frame (perhaps you create a routine with your family around dinnertime, but you allow for flexibility around time to allow for the variations in each person’s days and plans)?
Creating structure through schedules and routines is supposed to make life easier, smoother and more enjoyable. If you find yourself getting frustrated by self-imposed schedules and timeframes, re-evaluate the purpose and see if letting go of the specifics around times or changing the sequence of tasks will decrease the stress so you can experience more success.
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